It is time for the second evolution of this paper. I would like you to dive into the argument even deeper, find solid statistics to support your points. Maybe find 1 or 2 additional points that we could focus on later for the bigger essay. I will include the feedback from the professor on the previous paper.
“as I note in one of my comments, you certainly do paint in broad strokes here! What I mean, of course, is that you are assuming this stereotype applies to all working people, which is not the case. As you move forward and read more on your topic, I am sure you will see more and more the nuances. That said, I know there is a truth in what you write, thus the trends are not so much absent but simply need to be qualified here and there.”
So maybe try not to be as solidified in the argument but more open to the possibility of other arguments that could be relevant.
